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Monday, May 26, 2014

The Crappiest Invention of All Time

Posted on Mon, May 26, 2014 at 12:40 PM

I hate the fact that people are so lazy and indifferent towards public hygiene that auto-flush toilets need to exist. Is it so inconvenient to flush? Are you so busy that you can't take two seconds to push a lever? Do you abstain from flushing at home too? If you don't like to touch things in public restrooms, that's fine—use your foot or put a piece of TP over your hand. Flushing is a skill that most of us mastered by age six. If you've forgotten, please call your mother (or similar parental figure) for a refresher.

A point against the auto-flush is that not all come equipped with a manual backup switch. This means that you can't pre-flush if there are remainders from the previous user or inconsiderate non-flusher. It also means you can't double flush to get rid of your own flush-resistant waste (you know this happens sometimes, right?) Auto-flush eliminates the user's control over the cleanliness of the bowl. Sometimes, a manual flush is necessary!

You may try to use the "auto-flushers are more sanitary" argument here. If so, then you've obviously never been on the receiving end of the premature auto-flush. A slight movement away from the sensor and your bare arse is blasted with dirty toilet water. Not quite the germ-free experience you expected anymore.

Yeah, so can we all just agree to flush like the grown-ups we're supposed to be, and eliminate the need for auto-flush? That would be great, thanks. -Toilet Technophobe