I fucking hate you green bananas. I hate your hardness and gross not-ripe taste and how you make me gag. Then all of a sudden all seven of you are ripe and want to be eaten at the same time then tomorrow the uneaten ones are in my freezer waiting to become banana bread that I'll never make. Now I'm right back to where I started, with no bananas. And the only option is to buy more green bananas. Maybe a bit more planning would work but that would involve a twice- weekly trip to the grocery store which I'm not down with. And seriously, if I was into planning ahead I'd figure out something better to do than making a bacon hole. Fruit companies get your shit together. Fuck the bees, fix the banana situation. -Kirk P.