Dear grown-up man that pushes women when they’re standing alone at a gig: The first time you pushed me, I was scared. Congrats to you for living the life of a fair-sized white man and never having to be afraid of someone assaulting you. I do not live that life. You kept pushing me every time you entered or exited the room until I was just done. I gave you a chance to explain yourself in case there was some fun reason I was being accosted that I was unaware of. You seemed startled. Do the women you push around not normally talk back? The next time you almost knocked me over. You said you didn't know what my problem is, but that you'd stop pushing me if that's what I wanted. Then once my husband's band was done playing and I wasn't alone, and once my friend arrived and started eyeing you from across the bar, you tucked it between your legs and scurried home.

Next time you see me feel free to spontaneously grow into an adult and come up and apologize to me. Alternatively go right ahead and develop a taste for country music. Those will be the only gigs in the city I'm not at. And wherever I am, you need to know there are people who know you push women you view as alone and vulnerable. I want you to feel like I felt at the gig, at every gig—scared and unsure if you should just go somewhere and hide until it is over. —Not Fucking Having it at My Favourite Bar