You were the dark-haired beauty who's name name is almost the same as mine (S) who worked at a convenience store in Timberlea. I was the guy who flirted with you every time I came in...And I owe you a tea! I'd love to chat with you. —owlnight123

Dear '70s bush. I am so sorry. I realize now that I never loved you the way you deserve to be loved. I took you for granted, I grew tired of you. I thought you were tedious. I became intoxicated with the sleek, pornified look of the modern gal. I felt the weight of social expectations. So I looked the other way when someone tore you away from me. But the moment you were gone, I was forced to confront the bare truth: without you, I am nothing. I am as powerless as Samson; I am diminished. My sex drive died. I can't bear to look at the place you once occupied in my life. I miss you desperately. Please come back to me. I know you will. And when you do, I will never let anyone rip your natural, silky beauty away from me again. —Waxing and Waning

This isn't as much a bitch as much as a thank you. It's been a couple years and I know Halloween is your favourite time so it got me thinking about you. I blocked out how many great times we had. Watching a show, riding on my bike or just laughing together. There are many times when I do miss you but, I know we can't be around each other. I just wanted to say thanks for those really good times and I hope you can manage your problems so that you can have that and more with the next guy in your life. —Just a Guy

I would like to submit a short BIG thank you to all the young ladies out there who give up their seats on the bus for the elderly, handicapped and people with children/children in carriages and people with a lot of parcels.

I travel the bus daily back and forth to work, I have been watching for quite sometime now, how often the young ladies, anywhere I'd say from 18 to 30 years of age, are getting up and giving their seats to other patrons who really need to sit. It is obvious that the young ladies are giving up their seats way more often than the young men, not to say that there's not still a few good men out there who do, as there is at least one or two on my route that will give up their seats also, but the ratio of women to men is amazingly in the favour of the women. I think these ladies need to know that their efforts are recognized and appreciated and to be encouraged to keep up the good work. Way to go ladies!!!

Now the only other thing we need to work on are people with headphones on with music so loud everyone can hear it and to me there's nothing worse than listening to music that filtered through someone else's brain! —S.M.

But I'm sorry. Sorry for writing shit I don't know or understand. Sorry for being unfair to someone who doesn't deserve it. Sorry for being a chicken shit and not talking to you. I contacted one of the people involved (no more numbers under her orders) for coffee. She was kind but told me that I had stepped way out of line here. I asked if I should post a public apology. Her words: "You were eager enough to post and be a hero, now be eager enough to post and be the arsehole." I asked if I could comment on the bitch you (and/or your friends) posted at her. She looked at me and said, "Thank you, but no. It isn't worth the trouble." But I am stealing her words, shame on you! —Mute Meeting Buddy

On my way to get a morning coffee today, I noticed a poor pigeon with a broken wing. Unfortunately I didn't have a box with me, nor did I think it would be a good idea to bring him into the office. I went back to same place at lunch, and he was still there. I stood for a minute looking at him, wondering what to do. You (sweet man with a sub) noticed the pigeon and me looking at him. I told you the story and instead of laughing or making a dumb remark, you gave him a piece of your sub. I watched the pigeon eat it, and it looked like he loved it. Poor pigeon, I guess I'll have to see if you're still there at 4:30. —The Chick with a Friend