Hooray for holiday break but why in my negative 20 travels have I not seen one high school kid wearing anything less than than clothes for gym class? I am dressed for a tour of the Arctic tundra to walk to the corner store for fuck sakes. Put a fucking hat on.
—Not really a bitch but I'm still cold just just looking at your bare ankles

To the couple sitting near myself and my friend at a certain North End restaurant on Dec. 27th: Although you may not have anything better to talk about amongst yourselves on your date night, I would recommend against targeting the unassuming queer sitting in your sight range and ear shot. While you had fun, for a time, picking apart my non-gender-conforming behaviours given my sex while I sat 6 feet away from you waiting for my friend to return to the bathroom, I did my best to hold my own space. The male of your party of 2 had a great time shredding my masculine tendencies while the woman in your duo laughed and contributed to the bloodsesh. After what felt like eternity, congratulations for finally realizing what you were doing was bullying and straight up wrong. After one of you had your epiphany, you did a juvenile and hasty attempt to undo the damage of your words by talking about how 'sick' and 'awesome' 'someone like that' must be. ...Do you have any idea what you were saying? Did you realize, halfway through, that the jokes you were slinging and laughs you were having at my expense were indeed about a living, breathing person who has every right to enjoy a meal with a loved one in peace as you do? What if I had been different in another way that wasn't so easily slaughtered? Is it because you're afraid of what you don't understand? You do realize, that my 'body language' and other behaviours are NATURAL to me, right? You do realize that this is how I was born? I hope someone who knows you reads this publication and sits you down for a long, heartfelt reality check. People are people and if you don't feel they're worthy enough to deserve your respect, they at least deserve you to let them live in peace. I'm sorry you and your girlfriend obviously have nothing of substance to talk about and have to resort to the only thing you could grasp for as a target in your immediate surrounding environment. I sincerely hope you have an experience in which you can understand the impact of the hurt you inflict on others because you're bored.
—Not sorry my queerness made you uncomfortable

As a car driver, I am dismayed at the cost of cutting up our roadways for these stupid bike lanes that are more of a traffic hazard than anything. I pay huge gas taxes to pay for paved roads, and you pay NOTHING. You don't even have to license your bike. It' about time they brought that back and the money earned paid at least for the paint for these stupid things.
—Tired of paying for stupidity

Weather wonks: There are many meanings of the much-used word "messy." Must we include it in the shrill description of a snowstorm or its aftermath? This is Canada. And it's winter. Is garbage falling from the sky? Nope. They're small, light flakes formed by ice crystals. Being in the snow in the city - walking, shovelling, driving - is not being stuck in a mess, for crying out loud. These weather reports are messed up.—Guy from the north country

There's nothing I hate more. Every fucking holiday, I get woken up out of a dead sleep by the loudest noise ever! Did a war break out? Gunshots outside my bedroom window? No, it's the lame fucking fireworks again, ruining our environment with black clouds of smoke and disturbing the peace. This is midnight - people are alseep. The elderly, children, and normal people are in bed. After being woken up from a dead sleep at midnight -- after a series of loud explosion noises, that made the pets cower under the bed and run for the closet. After about 20 minutes of this heart thudding, anxiety inducing racket, there was silence again. The pets tentatively retreated from their hiding positions with saucer eyes and we all fell back alseep finally. Only to be woken again at about 1:00 Am from another round of fucking fireworks that continued for another 20 minutes straight. You fucking bunch of drunks got nothing better to do? Go the hell home and go to bed, and grow the fuck up. Like, oooh! ahhh! a fucking light show in the sky. Get over it already, losers. Stupid fireworks suck and so do you. People need their rest. It hurts the environment, it scares the shit out of people, babies and pets. Could give elderly a heart attack. This town and it's stupid traditions make me sick! Fuck ya'll!
—Nerves are shot, now I'm up!

Nova Scotia, I'm quite fond of you, but we need to talk about your driving habits.

Let's start with the tailgating. You should always keep at least a two-second following distance in the best circumstances, more in adverse circumstances. Some adverse circumstances are environmental (like bad weather or fog), some are mechanical (like balding tires, older brakes, larger and heavier vehicles that take longer to come to a stop), and some are driver related (you are tired, prone to road rage, impaired due to substances or age, inexperienced, over-confident, distracted by a phone, distracted by having a lot of other stuff going on in your life, whatever). Now, I know that you know how to tell distances in terms of time— know you can deal with "it's a 15 minute drive from here", for example. And I know you can count "one one hundred two one hundred" to estimate how long two seconds is. So put them together: Choose a point along the side of the road to count out the time between when the car ahead of you passes it and when you pass it, to check that you have a safe following distance. And stop tailgating.

Yeah, inevitable dude in an expensive black car (or the occasional dark blue station wagon) who NEEDS to go at least 20 over the speed limit getting on to the 102 outbound on Monday mornings, this applies to you too. You may be an exception ass, but the rules of the road and the rules of physics still apply to you.
—If you're that impatient even with me going 10 over, maybe you have a problem

I tried to hold the door for you at the Bridge Terminal on Sunday. You vehemently refused and told me to just fucking go. When I said I was just trying to be nice, you claimed YOU were the nice one. Your rudeness was the cherry on a shit-pie of a weekend.
—Fuck being nice

I thought paying five bucks for a cup of coffee in NYC was bad, until I came to your neighbourhood where they serve a $12 grilled cheese sandwich. No, I didn't order one as I'm over the age of ten—this was a special advertised outside of the eatery. You want $12 for two pieces of buttered Wonderbread and a slice of processed cheese? Seriously? I could buy a whole loaf of bread, a pack of cheese slices and a tub of butter for that! It is no surprise that a few weeks later there is a sign on the front door of said eatery that says, "We will be closing our shop soon". No kidding! Same goes for the hipster coffee shops that charge you eight bucks for an egg sandwich! I could get a big bagel sandwich with egg, sausage and cheese with a hashbrown and an extra large coffee for that price elsewhere. These shop owners need to get their head out the clouds. This ain't Hollywood or NYC! Don't even get me started on the used clothing consignment shops! 100 bucks for a pair of strangers' old stinky shoes? This is getting ridiculous. This isn't downtown. Lower your prices or go under!
—Home brew & garage croissants

Could the Bitch who posts the Bitches do their damn job and post the new bitches already? Tired of coming here for the same old crap! Update your shit!!!
—Ex-bitcher

This is lunacy. I find that finding someone who is committed to a relationship, someone who's sweet and trustworthy, seems to have dried up in all aspects. Like, my dearest friend can't get a guy because they either show their true intentions, get bored or just can't wait to get to know her. From personal experience of being a gay guy into monogamy, I thought straight people had it better—but in reality it's not much better at all. I swear to god that future generation will ask "What's monogamy?" because there are way too many FWB, open relationships and people looking for hookups. I weep for those who are generally nice people but are surrounded by an ocean of sleaze and unreliable jackasses who will say things just to draw you near and get what they want from you then leave.
—Malh