During the summer, the island in my crescent is a good 120 feet down the road. During the winter, the island in my crescent practically block my drive way.

Please back up, and give that windrow a push into the island. No one says that you aren't allowed to show some pride in your workmanship. —Get ‘Er Done

To the lady whose off leash dog attacked a man on Windsor Street last night around 10:30 or 11: The only thing worse than your dog handling skills is your parental skills. I came out around the corner after the dog attack, to see your shitty child (I assume), young adult male go screaming down the street after the man who your dog attacked with the intent to attack him again. Then your daughter joined in verbally accosting him, for the crime of being attacked by your dog.

Your whole inbred family would have attacked him if I hadn't started yelling across the street to leave him alone. Your son will get killed acting like he did. Rein in your shitty kids and your shitty dog. You shouldn't own either, you incompetent shit head. —Go Fuck Yourself

The thing about children of serious/chronic mental illness is that you have no right/freedom to an opinion. You go through life never having a voice, society tells you it's a waiting game. When you try to voice your opinion, it’s considered illegitimate. You must be going crazy. You must be getting paranoid. There is no “real” community, it’s labeled a “support group.” The community is based on drugs and dominance. Nobody wants to get to know you once they find out you have a parent with serious mental illness, unless they also have a close relative with serious mental health issues. Eventually you have to talk about it, and when you do, people usually respond with an awkward caught off-guard response. Then they either begin to distance themselves from you, or begin the cycle [as described above]. It can become so frustrating at times. Children of parents with mental illness grow up so much hopelessness, so much unseen societal pressure. They either give up and have drug/alcohol issues themselves, or they spend their whole lives fighting their own societal-determined fate. It’s a lonely world when you have no community, when it can ever be simply a “support group.” People rarely speak of loved ones with mental illness with pride and when they do, they are usually reminded that this is a societal taboo.

People with mental health “issues.” How come we have to consider these “issues”? These are some of the most interesting people you will ever meet! They have the most interesting stories, they are usually so innocent, and NOT violent. They care so much and can be really good parents. The children of people with serious mental health “issues” are the most empathetic people you will ever meet—they’ve seen and heard it all, all of their lives. They can see so many perspectives. They have so many stories to tell, but who wants to tell them if it’s just going to scare people away? If it’s just going to contribute to the negative societal label? —Not Really A Bitcher, Just A Little Frustrated

OK with me if you kill yourself at the wheel but you drove through a red light from a standing stop when I had advance green oncoming, so now we're talking about killing me. I saw the stupid smirk on your stupid face and the sarcastic wave when I honked.  You are borderline inhuman, so keep on trying to kill yourself but only yourself. —Legal Leftie

Fuck you. That's right. All of you light-fingered fucks who steal on a daily basis. People work hard and pay for their stuff and I don't know where you get the balls to just take what does not belong to you. All of you should be ashamed of yourselves. But probably not. Anyway, please stop. And fuck all of you if you won't. Life is hard for all of us and you don't have the right. Hope you all get caught and prosecuted. —IPAYWEPAY

To whoever broke into my car last night: Joke’s on you, jerk! All that’s in there is a bunch of fake birds and a literal pile of dirt. I hope you enjoyed my collection of fast food wrappers and empty cookie bags before you got freaked out and ran off. You could have at least closed the dash. But hey, I should thank you. I won’t forget to lock the doors again. —Thanks For Not Taking My Dirt

I'm sure smokers have felt persecuted during the anti-smoking campaigns of the last 30 years. Well, eating and sitting are the new smoking, and instead of lung cancer we now have type 2 diabetes, heart disease, and musculoskeletal disorders. Definitely it hurts to be perpetually reminded that there are certain ways that you're physically unhealthy.  But why is it a good idea to tell kids it's OK to be fat, when no one would tell a kid it's OK to smoke?  People are dying from both.  It's not good that I have to put this in the "Bitching" section so I don't get attacked for fat-shaming: I don't want anyone to feel ashamed of their body, and I also do want people to be physically healthy and not die from heart disease. We need to be able to encourage better physical health and better mental health at the same time.  So by all means, throw out your scale if that helps you love yourself.  Meanwhile, take smaller portions, wait five minutes before you take seconds, and, if you can afford it, eat half as much starchy carb and twice as many vegetables. —Not A Fat-Shamer

Webster's dictionary defines Definition of Bilingual as:

1. having or expressed in two languages a bilingual document an officially bilingual nation
2. using or able to use two languages especially with equal fluency bilingual in English and Japanese
3. of or relating to bilingual education
— bilingual noun
— bilingually adverb

Why do the locals here think it means French and English?
—Rosetta Stone

To whomever left a racist note on my friend's car, you obviously live nearby enough to observe the race of the car's owner and then you take the time to act on such a disgusting sentiment? You should probably go fuck yourself. You're a coward. I can't imagine feeling that violated on my own street, in my own home. In a perfect world, we'd find out who you are and beat the ever-living shit out of you. —Maybe Someday

To all the women out there who decide to give your caught red-handed boyfriend, husband, better half (hardly), a second, (third, fourth...) chance after finding out he’s cheating on you because he bullshits his way back into your heart by telling you he loves you and it will never happen again...Wake the fuck up! Leopards do not change their spots, and I’ll bet if you looked at his ass when he is giving you his explanation, his pants would have smoke coming out from them! —Have The Fire Extinguisher Ready